When you see the street sign to the right, the hand means stop and the man outline means walk, in every single language in the world. But many signs in New York are malfunctioning so you get both at once. What this means is, if you cross the street with both lit at once,
YOU CAN DIE!!!
Attention Walmort Shoppers
White people. Please leave the store.
Welcome to the Jets, L.T.!!!!
We are going to the Supe
iPAD
Like a tampon, only more expensive
Jewish Bomber
So he strapped some teflon to his head and everybody
thought he was a terrorist who was going to down the plane.
Salt Kills
STFU Mayor Bloombag. Let the restaurants do what they want and people won't go if it's bad. They don't need your nanny laws. Dick
Crooklyn
Suburb of Brooklyn
Ride Tiger's Wood
Coming soon to a movie theatre near you
Body Parts
What our rabbis got caught selling recently. Nothing serious. Only trafficking of kidneys from Israeli donors. And were they kosher?
A-Roid or A-Fraud
I can't decide which better describes the New
York Junkies steroid abuser, Alex Rodriguez so here are the
2 best. All the New York teams have really accomplished lately
is bending over and losing to the Philadelphia teams. Except
for the World Series.
The PlaxiCurse
Ding, dong, the Giants are dead. 2 home losses to the Fluffya Iggles. Had Plaxico's penis not turned off the safety on his glock, the Giants woulda been on there way to another Supe. No mo dawg!
Jail Madoff
Tough being the most hated man in NYC. No bail for you. Dag, he even f'ed his own sister.
Glocksico
Burress
Genius New York Giants wide receiver who shot hiself, had teammate Antonio Pierce hide the gun all while not possessing no permit and shit. Plex-a-Piece, Plex "Hitman" Burress and Plexiglasshole are runner ups. Now accepting all entries...
Awe-Phil
You witnessed the 2nd annual August collapse of the Mets
Broadway
Brett Fart
New Jet's QB Brett Fart. For all the hype, he really blows.
Fugly & Guilty of supplying Oxycontin to Heath Ledger
Mary Kate Olsen. "I didn't do anything, but I want immunity from prosecution." IDIOT
Fertilizer
What the Mets fans are according to new Mets skipper Jerry Manuel
Phillie-itis
What the Mets are inflicted with.
My Entire Team Sucks
The Governor has pulled out
You horny dawg, you, Elliot. I thought his
chick was kinda lame expecially for all the commotion
A Freakin' Dolla
A
Freakin' Dolla
How much bagels cost these days in da Bronze
The
Giants Won the Supe The Giants Won the Supe
So what if everybody only hates them a little
less than the Pats.
Lap
Dance Express
The renamed L Train. Nothing wrong with a
bunch of pole-ite ladies giving free lap dances in a steamy
train.
A
Vegetable Plagiarist
Jessica Seinfeld
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A-Bomb
Recently dropped over Yank's Alex Rodriguez's
departure
Dogfighting
is a sport
Certainly a fact since it was spoken by Knicks
guard Stephon Marbury
R.I.P.
Queen of Mean
Leona Helmsley died
My
Entire
Team
Sucks
Not the Yankees... And later, Randy Johnson,
miserable prick.
Shut
the F*&^*ck Up!
Barbara Streisand's comeback to a heckler
at Madison Square Garden
Dial
311
It's the perfect way to find out Oprah Winfrey's
phone # or who won American Idol or Is Ray Charles really
Stevie Wonder's uncle?
Dopey
& ANT Knee
Replacement DJ's for David Lee Roth who replaced
Howard Stern. They cannot be worser than Roth.
Illegal
immigrants
According to Mayor Bloomberg, we need them
to take care of our golf courses, so don't deport them, por
favor.
Teen
Queen/Coked out whore, fire crotch.
Lindsay Lohan. Tell slanguage not to call
you that and it becomes a headline.
Hair's
Johnny - - - >
Shave and a haircut, whodat Mister Damon?
Rat
School
Where all the NYC gubmint workers go to learn
about our local vermin. Your tax dollars hawd at woik.
Pennington's
Out
Testicle Squirty's in. Go Vinnie the Pooh...
212-772-1081
NYC Billionaire Mayor Mike Bloomberg's home
phone. Give him a call. Maybe he'll loan you some money...
Olive
Earl
Partner of Popeye
The
Big Snapple
Our new nickname courtesy of our new sponsor.
I'd rather see "Big Snapper." No
comment.
Saturday
Nite Lie
Ashlee Simpson pulls
a Nilli Vanilli on live TV and gets caught lip synching. Only
thing bigger than the lie is her nose...
Here are the liar's excuses (and her dad's
too) (Voting disabled)
The band screwed up
Technical difficulties
Acid reflux
"Oh yeah. I do use voice overs"
Let's
Stay Together
What Al Green sang at
the Apollo with his fly down. Compounding the problem was
the fact that "Big" Al doesn't wear any underwear.
3
Hunjy Thousand Dollars
What you'll pay for
living below Lenny Kravitz's condo when his terlit overflows
into yours. Eating a lot of Mexican food or what Lenbo?
"Go
ahead and throw away the evidence"
What the New York Dept
of Health tells you after you find a condom in yer bagel.
Who's
yer daddy, New Yawkas?
The Boston Redsox, Jackolantern!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nice
How Martha Stewart describes
her local cellmates...
GET
AWAY FROM ME!!!
Mary Kate Olsen's greeting
to her young fans. To quote Joe Dirt, "Dag, she's mean."
97
cats, seven dogs, several reptiles and a sea gull living with
four young children and their mother.
A typical Yonkers household?
RatherGate
Come on Dan Rather.
Either admit your documents about Bush's war service are a
lie or cough up your sources. Book em Danno.
Earl
Leaks out of your tuna sandwich
Pizza
Paula
Everyone outside of
Brooklyn says "Pizza Parlor"
New
Queen of Mean
Move over Leonna, and
let Rosi O'Donnell take over. Even Leonna wouldn't say "If
you lie, you'll get cancer and die."
Shockey
NFL Giant player. Detested everywhere
but here.
How
Awe Ya?
Typical greeting
DUMBO
Down under Manhattan Bridge Overpass
(artists community near Brooklyn)
Straphangers
NYC subway riders
Go
to Jersey
An insult
Da
Gawdfadda
Someone you respect and do not cross
Cruise
da duce
Ride on 42nd street
Good
Sense a Yuma
A good sense of humor
Turdy
Turdin' Lex
33rd street and Lexington Avenue
Whadaya
Whadaya?
I am dumbfounded by your audacity
Washda
Closendaws
Warning heard on the subways
Poppy
Wit a Shmear
Poppy-seed bagel with cream cheese
Less
Order a Pie
I would like to order a pizza
BQE
Brooklyn Queens Expressway
L
Eye E
Long Island Expressway
Hawbuh
Water between Manhattan and Brooklyn
Huh
Opposite of him (Heard on "My Cousin Vinny"
New
Yawk
Where we be at
Long
GUY Len
Long Island
Terl
It
Toilet
Chalk
Lit
Opposite of vanilla
Surfing
the Tunnel
Bumpy ride on number 4 express
Tarco
Most say taco
Earl
Mixed with vinegar on salads
Yonkiz
and Yonkuz
People from Yonkers
Dawta
Not my son
Egg
Cream
Seltzer, milk and chocolate
Cawna
Fish Treet
At the corner of fifth street
Joy'k
Someone you don't like
Hawt
Dawg Awe da Way
Hotdog with chili, onions & mustard
Da
Bronze
Only NYC borough that begins with a "D"
Brender
Most call her Brenda
Brownie
People who ticket your car
Woke
Up Smellin' Like Jersey
What Belushi used to say when he woke up
with a BAD hangover
Stat
Nigh Lynn
Staten Island
Oner
Niner
Take the 1-9 train downtown
Cohen
Put Ice cream in it
Doily
Boyd
Catches the worm
Pawta
Crappa
Outside convenience toilets
NoHo
or SoHo
Areas north or south of Houston street
Mob'll
Roy
Type of bread (marble rye)
Dah
Boat a Yews
The both of you
Hero
Sub sandwich to most (Hoagie in Philly)
Toy
Teen
One less than fourteen
Mudder
Married your fodder
Fun
Spanish is a breakthrough for learning Spanish
Find your phrase in the left column. Say the
fun phrase in the middle column with emphasis on the RED
word or object. That's all there is to directions for Fun
Spanish. Crank up your computer's volume to really
enjoy the sound bytes. Links to more phrases below.
Below is a 2-page spread from my book. Here
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are compared to any of the thousands of Spanish learning guides
out there. (1) Find what
you want to say on the left page. (2)
Follow the arrow to the right page (3)
Say the Fun
Spanish phrase quickly with emphasis on
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The Spanish follows. (5)
Learn to string together numerous phrases which will make
you sound very competent. (6)
Draw your own pictures to help with memorizing and pronounciation.
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Here are 2 pages from my book.
There's lots more information below!
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Spanish is 5 1/2 inches by 8 1/2 inches,
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Here are the phrases
you'll learn in my book: How's it going? • Fine and yourself? •
Fine • With pleasure • My pleasure • Welcome
• Good or nice • Yes • I must... • What
do you say? • Not much, yourself? • What's new?
• The good one • In a moment • A little bit
• With me? • Can we?.. • Yes/No • That's
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How? • I don't know how. Remember you can combine
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There is no better product for learning Fun
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remember my motto, If you can speak
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Print this form to purchase Fun
Spanish by mail order:
Quantity
Item
Cost
___________
Fun Spanish Booklet ($4.99 Each)
Postage/handling (FREE to United States)
Postage to Canada and Mexico $2.00 per book
Postage to rest of world $4.00 per book
___________
___________
___________
BULK DISCOUNTS to U.S.
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Here's a picture of my daughter enjoying Fun
Spanish. She's been speaking phrases in
numerous languages since she was 2 years old (she's now 10)
with the help of my fun method. I'd like to see every child
enjoy and excel at languages like mine does.
There are 2 ways to order Fun Spanish. If you don't mind wasting toner cartridges or ink cartridges, print this page for mail order or click on the link below for credit card orders
Shootin and beatin and peppa sprayin
Only in New York
